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A LIFETIME OF SORRY'S

By Cheryl

oh god i'm really sorry
thats what i always say
to people when i've hurt them
but its too late in the day

i ask them to forgive me
but even when they do
it doesnt make a difference
coz YOU never forgive you

you keep on punishing yourself
because they say "your bad"
your dying with embaresment
because they say "your mad"

"i wont do it again" you swear
but you know thats not true
coz it's always gonna happen
for aslong as you are you

you always lose your temper
despite the fact you try
shouting,kicking,punching
and then you start to cry

the tears are from frustration
and your heart is filled with pain
but what comes next is far worse
yep thats right,here comes the shame

you think THEY think your crazy
you even think it too
you feel that they all hate you
so you say before they do

but really they dont hate you
they just dont understand
how someone who looks 'normal'
could overeact so bad!

it's YOU who really hates you
you despise yourself inside
you hate the things you say and do
and 'DAMN' that stubborn pride

pride stops you saying sorry
you start pulling out your hair
your determined not to crumble
and pretend that you dont care

but really you do care too much
and then your'e left with guilt
you cant believe you shouted
just because your drink got spilt

it's then that you say sorry
but by then it's just too late
because of A.D.H.D
you've lost another mate

you tell yourself "you're stupid"
"now look at what you've done"
"not only are you lonely"
"but you gave this to you son!

as if this wasn't bad enough
i had to make it worse
i gave it to a loved one
passed on this awful curse

a lifetime full of sorry's
looking back with deep regret
passed down the generation
he's inheirated my debt

but he wont suffer on his own
he's got his mothers love
supportive nan and grandad
and thank god the lord above

i know that he will make it
it's possible you see
to be successful in this world
despite A.D.H.D

our problem is a small one
the bigger one is YOU
you look at us so puzzled
god you just dont have a clue

you only see our bad side
the anger and abuse
you say "that A.D.H.D"
"oh that's just their exuse"

well A.D.H.D does exist
despite what all you say
and my son is gonna make
i'm just waiting for that day

and when he finally makes it
he'll stand up tall and proud
and then YOU wont be laughing
it's OUR turn to laugh out loud

you doubted everything we said
you laughed with all the rest
but did you forget the saying?
'those who laugh last,laugh longest


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